Tag Archives: giraffe

Actor Josh Hartnett Cannot Draw A Giraffe

Actor and Teen Hartthrob Josh Hartnett

Josh Hartnett

Actor and Modern Adonis Josh Hartnett

Josh Hartnett (Wiki) is an actor and producer from St. Paul, MN, who is perhaps best known for his roles in Pearl Harber, O, 40 Days and 40 Nights, and 30 Days of Night. When he isn’t acting, he enjoys his long walks on the beach being the reincarnation of Adonis, the Greek God of beauty and desire.

Over his lifetime he has been voted one of Teen People‘s “21 Hottest Stars Under 21″ and, later, one of its “25 Hottest Stars Under 25.” Not-Teen People magazine voted him one of the “50 Most Beautiful People” before Bliss clarified this by stating he is the “3rd Sexiest Male.” If that’s still not enough for you, unnecessarily-skeptical reader: PETA voted him the “Sexiest Vegetarian Alive.”

When Mr. Hartnett isn’t out being beautiful, he is also an activist. For example, in 2012, he did a lot of work for the Obama Presidential Campaign in Minnesota, which is where this giraffe comes from.

Now, if I may let you in on a little secret, friend: Growing up, I wanted to be Josh Hartnett. I loved him in The Faculty and – cards on the table – have a thing for Minnesota Joshs. So, it warms my hart seeing our life journeys come together like this. While he’s off being nominated for Teen Choice Awards here I am capitalizing upon it able to be a part of it …  *wistful sigh*

[Courtesy of the wonderful Stacey Rosana of Minnesota].

Senator Tammy Baldwin Awful Giraffe

U.S. Senator Tammy Baldwin (WI-D)

Senator Tammy Baldwin (Web|Twitter) is the junior U.S. Senator for the cheesy state of Wisconsin. Prior to her 2012 election, she served seven terms in Congress representing Wisconsin’s 2nd district. A progressive champion, she is also the first openly-gay U.S. senator in history, which is pretty cool. I guess.

On April 20, 2013, Senator Baldwin was the keynote speaker at the Second Annual Humphrey-Mondale Dinner in Minneapolis, MN. Following her speech, I squeezed through the crowd where I nervously made the holy ask. To my surprise, without any hesitation or question whatsoever — BOOM!

Seriously, she was completely unfazed.

(Eh, but then again I’m sure she’s seen it all — she’s from Wisconsin, let’s not forget).

Senator Baldwin’s press team did not respond to my requests for comment.

Theoretical Physicist Lawrence Krauss Awful Giraffe 4 23 11

Theoretical Physicist and Author Lawrence Krauss

In light of the holiday season I thought I would treat everyone to a gift that has been sitting in the giraffe library for quite a while. Unfortunately, there is no exciting, adventure-filled story behind this as Dr. Krauss simply said, “Everything I do is better than Kaku” when I showed him Michio Kaku’s Uni-giraffe (he really doesn’t like that I guy), but you be the judge!

Theoretical Physicist Lawrence Krauss

Lawrence Krauss (wiki; web) is a theoretical physicist who teaches at Arizona State University and is the director of its Origins Project. Perhaps best known for his book The Physics of Star Trek (1995), Krauss is a popularizer of science who has written editorials in many publications and is a frequent guest on National Public Radio’s “Science Friday”. In January 2012 he has a book coming out that will address why there is something rather than nothing; in fact, in A Universe from Nothing he will make the case that “not only can something arise from nothing, something will always arise from nothing.”

Seems straightforward enough.

Though sometimes nothing is better than something.

Michael Shermer's Awful Giraffe

Writer and Editor Michael Shermer

Michael Shermer

Michael Shermer (web; twitter) is a humanist/atheist/nontheist/skeptic thinker best known for his seventeen books on psychology, biology, history, and … cycling, the former of which includes the popular Why People Believe Weird Things: Pseudoscience, Superstition, and Other Confusions of Our Time (2002) and his most recent The Believing Brain: From Ghosts and Gods to Politics and Conspiracies – How We Construct Beliefs and Reinforce Them as Truths (2011). In addition, Shermer is the editor-in-chief of Skeptic magazine and also writes a monthly column for Scientific American. So, as you can probably infer, if you give this guy a pen, he will probably return it completely drained – along with an essay.

Approaching him at a convention in Fargo, ND, Shermer was happy to contribute though with the proviso that he have full artistic license to do as he wished. Having no problem with this, I let him do as he wished. After a matter of minutes he returned my notebook with what I can only call a classic. Unlike his giraffe-drawing contemporaries, Shermer saw this as an intellectual challenge; instead of just creating a reflection of the social construction we call a “giraffe” he broke it down to its barest essence. And while I am by no standard (but my own) an art critic, I do believe Shermer to be a noble successor to Duchamp and contemporary of Damien Hirst.

This is the future of art.

… And what a sad future it is.

Eight Year Old Mikey's Pretty Awful Giraffe

Eight Year Old Mikey

A close friend of mine participates in the Big Friend-Little Friend program here at the University and thought it would be an interesting idea to have her little friend “Mikey” draw a giraffe. Given, I do believe children this age probably should be drawing giraffes because of the contribution imagination has on one’s cognitive development, but I am including this here for two reasons:

  1. It’s absolutely adorable, and
  2. It illustrates what we have known for a while: even an eight year old can draw a better giraffe than most of the other people on this website. (I’m talking to you, Bobby B. – you have no excuse).

(Aren’t the teeth just precious?)