This page is reserved specifically for those who have explicitly turned down an invitation to contribute to Giraffes Drawn By People Who Should Not Be Drawing Giraffes. While I do not encourage any public shaming of these individuals, it does hurt me on a personal level knowing that there are folks in the world willing to spit in the face of the editorial board. Yet even as I complain I know that every great movement has its resistance.
1. Betty from Mt. Rushmore. March 2011. More information will come when the “National Park Ranger Giraffe” goes online, but she knows what she did.
2. U.S. Congressman Collin Peterson (MN-7). April 2011. To read more visit the post about US Senator Al Franken.
3. Pulitzer-Prize Winning Poet Gary Snyder. April 18, 2011. Read about the incident at “Poet and Author Robert Bly (And the Gary Snyder Incident).”
4. Minnesota Orchestra Conductor Osmo Vanska. April 2011. More information will come when Principal Trumpet of the Minnesota Orchestra Manny Laureano’s giraffe goes online.
5. Former MN Governor and Conspiracy Theorist Jesse Ventura. June 2011. When approached at a book signing for 63 Documents the Government Doesn’t Want You To Read in Rosedale, MN, his reply was a simple, “I don’t know what a giraffe looks like.” No comment.
6. Gender Theorist Michael Kimmel. October 27, 2011. An organization I am a part of brought to the University of Minnesota-Morris campus for a public lecture and even though I had chatted with the guy, had dinner with him and guided him around he told me that he would not contribute to the blog because his drawing would be “pretty awful.” He wouldn’t listen to my pleas that that was the point.
7. Author Peter S. Beagle. June 2014. Beagle wrote the beautiful book, The Last Unicorn (1968). When I met him at Houston’s ComicPalooza, both his handler (?) and I harassed him for twenty minutes but he never budged. I left him my card and email but have yet to hear from him. Maybe someday …